Archiving Ava

December 2025

Lingering Where Warmth Lives

Whether it was staying under the covers or brewing another cup of tea, the month held lots of warming moments. My favorites are below, including some small scenes, notes and humanities that held my hand through to the new year.

Things That Lingered

Not a thing, but someone lingers in my mind. I had my 3 year anniversary with Collin this year and he has lingered longer than I could have ever hoped when we first met. He returns to me when life is loud, and I to him. We are each other’s base camp. When we feel strong enough to climb life’s mountaintops, we know where to rest. He lingers with me in the thinnest moments of our love, where we feel like parting ways might be easier. But we linger. Together in the silence when our eyes don’t meet, but our hands do. We linger in the hug after a long workday. We linger on the couch snuggling the cats. We linger on the same side of the table at a restaurant. Collin is in no rush, and he doesn’t mind waiting. He has helped me to slow down and linger with him in these moments. I hope to linger with him for a lifetime.

three year anniversary

Small Scenes

I was struggling one day at work and started to journal on an app called “How We Feel”. After diving deeper past the rough exterior, underneath was the desire to be understood. I reached out to my friend, Ally. She picked up as reliably as ever and asked, “are you calling to catch up or with plans?” to which I responded, “both.” Less than an hour later we were in the car together headed to dinner. We had to turn around twice because of her taking us on a “backroad” but we eventually caught up over Thai food.

There was a warmth in the room that can be attributed to several things like how cold it was outside or the hot meal in front of us both. Even going onto the square later to try a new sweets shop reminded me how warm some spaces can be depending on who you’re with. Waiting for my drink, (awful – a matcha that had no blended powder, just clumps of bitter green in lukewarm milk) watching a girl play Minecraft on her laptop knowing she likely just finished finals was a nostalgic feeling. Taking a selfie in front of the Christmas tree with the exactly wrong lighting and deciding to settle for a bad photo and not trying to fix it. All these moments brought such a contentment. Dinner with Ally encapsulated what this month felt like to me; laughing, celebrating, and bad photos.

silly picture on the square

Thresholds

Doorways appear in many ways. A chance to speak up or a choice to continue, and we collectively begin upon the threshold of the New Year.

The threshold I’m standing in is one of awareness and engagement. I no longer look forward to picking up my phone and losing hours. I highly recommend downloading Dumb Phone if you want to use your phone as a tool and not a distraction.

This year is also the final step in applying for physical therapy school. During the first months of the year, I’m finishing my last prerequisites (Physics I & II) and studying the GRE basics to get an acceptable score. The rounds of submitting applications begin in July. A doctorate program doesn’t scare me and neither do rejections, but the anxiety of anticipation is quite the hurdle.

Where Ease Appeared

If anyone knows me – they know my skincare is deeply engraved into who I am. It’s been an anchor in my mornings and evenings. Even if I don’t want to wash my face out of a rushed day or idleness, habit lends me the necessary fortitude. My routine has always been a cyclical endeavor. I want structure or freedom and oscillate between the two. But, I find myself relying on tendencies that keep me feeling like myself – AKA, my skincare.

My main habit is my tea, mostly matcha – but in the colder months I reach for the Constant Comment tea which is warmer and more aromatic (and more caffeinated when I don’t want to leave the house).

I recently indulged in a purchase of the Osea body lotion and oil. The scent is an herbal / lemon / cypress scent that feels like a spa. It has found a comfortable place in my life after a shower or before bed.

On the Screen & the Page

My main source of entertainment has been movies, shows and books now that my phone is no longer an opportunity to doom scroll.

A show, Vinland Saga – what begins in violence slowly turns inward. The story keeps returning to the idea that having no enemies is not naïve, but deliberate – a way of choosing what you carry and what you refuse to. It stayed with me longer than I expected.

A show, A Discovery of Witches – a story grounded in libraries, bloodlines, and a kind of elemental power that has been deliberately restrained. What unfolds is less about discovering magic than remembering it — watching a woman circle back to the forces she was taught to fear, and slowly learn who she is when she stops withholding parts of herself.

A book, Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries by Heather Fawcett. Old pages, quiet corners, and things half-seen. Wonder that lingers, curiosity that pulls without demand. A sense that the world holds more than meets the eye, and that magic is less about spectacle than the attention we bring to it.

Carrying Forward

Not resolutions – something gentle enough to keep.

  1. Make this site a habit for monthly entries.
  2. Put some time towards a fitness goal, even if it’s just 10 pushups a day.
  3. One book a month.

A Few Frames

Markers in time

  • December 1 – Swan Lake by Kyiv Ballet

  • December 2 – Three Year Anniversary with Collin

  • December 5 – Christmas Tree Lighting on the Square

  • December 12 – Dinner with Ally

  • December 17 – The Beginning of Archiving Ava

  • December 25 – Christmas Day

  • December 31 – New Years Eve Party

Filed for Reference (linked)

Goodbye, for now

Thanks for chatting, it’s been great to catch up with you. Let’s do it again soon.

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